"Today we’re living in an anti-Waldo world, where you don’t want to blend in and have people struggle to find you. You want your personal brand to stand out like you’re wearing a red and white sweater, and everyone else has on black."
"If what you wear says more about who you are then what you say when you speak, then my advice is to keep quiet and wear loud clothing."
"Grandpa often tells me I dance like my legs are engulfed in flames. I just go out there and put the fire of desire in women’s hearts."
"His name was Tom Tombstone, and if he had a middle name it was probably Death. But I didn’t call him Tom, or even Mr. Tombstone, because he introduced himself as Robert Winston. And I wondered how this stranger could shake my hand, look me in the eye, smile, and expect me to believe such a bold-faced lie?"
"I drink coffee like steam is the ghost of dead water. Ever tried inhaling the afterlife?"
"This Valentine’s Day rent a poem for your loved. They come in three sizes—small, medium, and romantic. Free refills available to Premium Members."