More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I mined my mind, and I found no love. My heart is where excavation yields gold, and if you dig me as much as I dig you, we can both get rich."
"If I fail to succeed, I have succeeded in failing."
"I wish I could grow swords like I can roses. Wouldn’t war be so romantic then? Then the U.S. could really show the world how much it loves it."
"In a battle of believability, the winner is the one with the best body language, not the clearest logic."
"I just developed a gun that shoots mustaches. Sometimes a disguise can be deadly, especially if it’s your love you’re trying to camouflage."