#Comedian

"To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it."

"My ship came in,then it sank!"

"I think humor is important for all of us, and a great comedian is a great treasure."

"Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... sort of. It's just a filler. Sort of... it doesn't really mean anything. But after certain things, sort of means everything. Like... after "I love you"... or "You're going to live"... or "It's a boy!"

"Fuck it... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", it's just "fuck it, man."

"Shut up…let me tell you, LET ME. Every time I look at your face or even remember it, it wrecks me. And the way you are with me and you’re just fun and you shit all over me and you make fun of me and you’re real. I don’t have enough time in any day to think about you enough...I don’t even think about women anymore. I think about you."