#positive-mindset

"Fat Bungee Jumpers When I watch a fat woman bungee jumpI swear I can feel the earth leaving its orbit."

"What Women Want [10w] What women want is a feeling of security with abs."

"Chase vs. Choose Happiness If you chase after happiness, it may escape you.If you choose happiness, it may take your house away.Both chasing and choosing have their hazards ~but they're less risky than waiting for happiness to find you.Remember, happiness is a lazy ass motherfuckerthat doesn't go on search and rescue missions."

"How Hard? [10w] Fuck’em hard enough to make their breasts move like Jell-O."

"Rat-Race [10w] There’s no refuge for creatures opting out of the rat-race."

"Coins [10w] Statesmen whose faces are on coins are amenable to change."

"Dictator [10w] Clever dictators keep their friends closeand their enemies dead."

"Nebraska State Motto Equality before the law.Where Monsanto/GMO corn is above the law."

"Athens, Texas Haiku Blackeyed Pea Capital of the World.Yup, just another shithole."

"Ranger Smith, Unemployement and the Possibility of Unperceived Existence If a tree falls in the forest and we're not there,do we fire the park ranger without making a sound?"

"The Bonds That Tie Weak bonding is sharing a common interest;strong bonding is sharing a common enemy."

"Cutthroat Competition [10w] If competition becomes cutthroatit suggests business has become piracy."

"New Age Hype Don't 'honor your feelings.'Half the time they're full of shit.Don't 'embrace' anything without a pulse.Mindfulness should include not listening to quacks."

"The Road to Poetry Hell [10w] The road to poetry hell is likepaved with similes."

"Spreading Yourself Too Thin We tend to bite off more than we can chewbecause we've got big mouths."

"National Rifle Association Credo [10w] God gave us two hands to holdan assault rifle."

"Depth of Love [10w] The longer the time between relationships,the deeper your love."

"Reflection Upon Reflection [10w] Don't look into a mirror in rooms full of mirrors."

"Oppressor vs. Oppressed [10w] Love somtimes disintegrates into becoming the oppressor or the oppressed."

"A Moment Before Impact [10w] The deer's eyes were moonstones, reflecting back my car's headlights."