All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an... - Will Rogers

"Always drink upstream from the herd."

"I never met a man that I didn't like."

"Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else."

"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces."

"All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance."