Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse... - Mark Twain

"I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!"

"A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory."

"We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that the savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter."

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."

"The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated."