Eating a plain bagel with no cream cheese is like eating the... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"Eating a plain bagel with no cream cheese is like eating the inner tube of a bicycle tire, and I’d rather ride my roller skates to work."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"I'm about to get my grind on. My coffee grind. Like a true hustler."
"I breathe onto a mirror just to make sure I’m still alive, and to see how good looking my breath is."
"She’s ignoring my texts. Maybe she’s dead. Oh, I certainly hope so. I’d hate to think she’s being deliberately unresponsive."
"Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by."
"I’ll wear a maze on a necklace, dangling over my chest, because if you want to get at my heart, you have to be ready to lose yourself."