Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you i... - George Carlin
"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"
More quotes by George Carlin
"How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies."
"If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?"
"Meow” means “woof” in cat."
"Electricity is really just organized lightning"
"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."