"Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that."
"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."
"Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it."
"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."
"I think I am, therefore, I am... I think."
"I was thinking about how people seem to read the bible a lot more as they get older, and then it dawned on me—they’re cramming for their final exam."