"I gave her a broken watch, to symbolize that my love for her is forever and timeless. And as an excuse to why I’m always late."
"We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and I’m a gentleman, I’ll shave mine off."
"In a bookstore you can find me in the romance section, because I’m not a lover, I’m a reader."
"I am approximately 96.694444% in love with you. Of course, that’s just a rough estimate."
"Stairs, are they going up or are they going down? They’re so confusing! If love were a physical thing, it would be stairs."
"She’ll come to love me or she won’t. I’m a fisherman, not a hunter."