More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33

"Goodbyes, they often come in waves."
"Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers."
"I’m very close to my dad. He’s about six inches away right now and snoring in my ears."
"The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn’t around to propose to her."
"I haven’t been feeling like myself lately. No, I’ve been feeling like my clone."