More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Love is a Heaven Cake, with clouds for icing. If there are two pieces left, I guess I can have seconds."
"I keep water in my pockets, as portable fish tanks. My love letters often get soggy with sentimentality."
"Silver is an investment. It’s like a second-place future. Makes me want to create Michael Phelps-flavored ice cream and eat a whole tub."
"What does it mean to be the best? It means you have to be better than the number two guy. But what gratification is there in that? He's a loser—that’s why he's number two."
"I can't throw away cologne because that is Nostalgia in a Bottle, the scent of yesterday, and it reminds me of her more clearly than her picture."