I type on my keyboard like I’m Beethoven on the piano. My wo... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"You haven’t seen nothing until you’ve seen zero. You also haven’t seen nothing until you’ve seen all the love I have for politicians."

"I want to sprint into her open arms, but I run as fast as two shoes tied together and thrown over a telephone wire. I’m like Roger Bannister, now that he’s in a wheelchair."

"People with money have to worry about who their real friends are. I don’t have that problem for two reasons: I don’t have any money, and I don’t have any friends."

"When tragedy hits close to home, like your neighbor’s house, it really makes you stop and think. And while you’re thinking, I’ll be speeding off in the getaway car."

"Love isn’t in a hurry like a flurry of flowery words on paper. It’s lush and slow to grow its aroma in the garden of time."