More quotes by Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to write a book called, "Bonfires and Bras,"which follows around a young, braless feminist who struggles to adopt in air conditioned rooms, as her hardened nipples cause her excess embarrassment."
"I want to get the words "Courage"and "Bravery"tattooed across my back, so people could associate me with those things as they read them while they chase me."
"I want to write the Boston Marathon of run-on sentences. And since it'll be so long, I'll replace all the commas with the word Gatorade, to help push people through it."
"I want to meet a guy named Art. I'd take him to a museum, hang him on the wall, criticize him, and leave."
"I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral."