I want to lose weight by eating nothing but moon pies, which... - Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to be a cowboy, but only long enough to barge into a saloon and bellow, "Who's the yellowbelly that stole my happy trail?"

"I want to lose weight by eating nothing but moon pies, which have significantly less gravity than earthier foods such as fruits and vegetables."

"I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair."

"I want to write a book so long that it will take the average person their whole life to read. It will be exactly the same length as the Bible."

"I want to be a cowboy, but only long enough to barge into a saloon and bellow, "Who's the yellowbelly that stole my happy trail?"