"I wouldn’t feel great if you left me alone, but I wouldn’t feel bad either. I’d feel good, like I always do, which has nothing to do with you, even if you’ll have nothing to do with me."
"2 out of 4 numbers prefer being in the bottom 50 percent. Half of all lovers also prefer being on the bottom."
"You don’t need batteries for an introduction. Buy my Networking in a Box today and see for yourself. (Handshakes sold separately.)"
"I spoke like a spoke on a wheel, as I went around and around without actually saying what I wanted to say. I was love flustered."
"If I waste all my charity, all I’ll wind up with in the end is the wind. Still, I think I want to be the Dandelion of Love."
"A window—it’s more entertaining than TV. Just ask a cat looking out, or a man looking in on a life he desires."