More quotes by Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

"I saw this beautiful girl the other day. She had an ass behind her that seemed to go on for days. In fact, I’m still going on about her."
"When I was a little boy, I used to work in a sweatshop. We made deodorant."
"I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning."
"I'm so excited. I just bought a new file cabinet, some manila folders, some sticky note pads, and a few highlighters, and I think I'm finally ready to enter into organized crime."
"I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning."