If you share your soup, I’ll share my wisdom. I brought a sp... - Jarod Kintz, A Story That Talks about Talking Is Like Chatter to Chattering Teeth, and Every Set of Dentures Can Attest to the Fact That No..

"If you share your soup, I’ll share my wisdom. I brought a spoon, but did you bring a pen? How are you going to take notes, you fool!"

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More quotes by Jarod Kintz, A Story That Talks about Talking Is Like Chatter to Chattering Teeth, and Every Set of Dentures Can Attest to the Fact That No..

"I am the Love Ventriloquist. And if you say I’m not, I’ll say it so it sounds like you said I am."
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"I found your love like I found religion: in an aluminum trashcan in the middle of the Utah desert."
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"Leave the cage open. If you love someone, give them a chance to leave. You can always lock them up again should they return to you."
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"I am the Guillotine of Love, and I will never lose my head over another woman again."
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"I would pour you a glass of wine, but wouldn’t it be more romantic if you sipped it out of my armpit?"
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