If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. - Woody Allen

"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good."

"Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic."

"Death doesn't really worry me that much, I'm not frightened about it... I just don't want to be there when it happens."

"I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic."

"To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition."