"In a blind taste-test, my kisses were rated as Helen Kelleresque. Women love how the only sense I keenly possess is nonsense."
"A windmill has arms, but does not hug. Where’s the love?"
"She has a sly smile, and eyes that seem to see my essence as they explore my soul and implore my spirit to enter her. I look at her and I see love."
"Love is like a portable lamp/sex toy. The world calls those flashlights, but I’m much more romantic."
"I often wear camouflaged pants so when I walk I look like a floating torso. I love with the same air of mystery."
"I make love like the 13th floor is the 14th floor of a hotel. I give it that little extra that takes it to a whole new level."