"Stairs, are they going up or are they going down? They’re so confusing! If love were a physical thing, it would be stairs."
"The waves were choppy, like Chuck Norris' karate hands. The ocean would have been still, if I weren't making love in it."
"Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag."
"She didn't say it, I only thought she said it. So really it was my thought, my words, and not hers. How could I confuse "I love you"with "May I take your order?"
"We fell in love like two medium pizzas in one large stomach. I wish dad would have saved a few slices for us."
"You’ll drown in my love story, if I ever write it using a fountain pen."