"He said he came in second place, so I assumed there were only two competitors. But you never know with love, there may have been a third party involved."
"In a bookstore you can find me in the romance section, because I’m not a lover, I’m a reader."
"To become one who believes two become one, you need love in your life."
"She has a sly smile, and eyes that seem to see my essence as they explore my soul and implore my spirit to enter her. I look at her and I see love."
"We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and I’m a gentleman, I’ll shave mine off."
"The waves were choppy, like Chuck Norris' karate hands. The ocean would have been still, if I weren't making love in it."