More quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

"Elaine: Ugh, I hate people.Jerry: Yeah, they're the worst."
"If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?"
"To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. To live is to keep moving."
"Nobody enjoys the 'little show about nothing' humor more than me, but that is never the way I look at it."
"The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever seen that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? Not much of a weapon there. Corkscrews. Bottle openers. ‘Come on, buddy, let’s go. You get past me, the guy in the back of me, he’s got a spoon. Back off, I’ve got the toe clippers right here."