More quotes by Jon Stewart

"Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion."
"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."
"I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character."
"You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena."
"You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything. Yes, I want to look back and know that I was terrible at a variety of things."