"Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag."
"You can’t buy love, it’s true. However, I am offering mine for rent. Buy one year and get the next six months at half price."
"In a bookstore you can find me in the romance section, because I’m not a lover, I’m a reader."
"Two empty chairs are not a good use of space. Fill them up with love."
"If you don’t know how to love, then any old robot or mechanical device would best suit your relationship style. In this situation, vacuum cleaners might make the best lovers."
"If I had no penis, how would I pee? How would I make love? How would I think?"