More quotes by George Carlin

"Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy."
"That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it."
"It's important in life if you don't give a shit. It can help you a lot."
"Electricity is really just organized lightning"
"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."