"Most kids start talking by age two. I didn't say a word until I was twelve. I was just angry and defiant I guess. My first word wasn't "Mom"or "Dad."It was "No."
"Gold is liquid sunlight frozen in time, and that’s why I love the way ice melts in vodka. I also love the way ice melts in vodka. I’ll have another shot, if you’ll reload the revolver."
"The summer temperature outside was 45 degrees, so I turned 45 degrees and went right back inside. It was so cold outside because that’s where all her love for me was."
"It’s 4:00 in the afternoon and I’m just now putting on clothes. The life of a writer is as free as the pizza I just had delivered is not."
"A love story in six words: Hello. Goodbye. In between was marriage."
"Different people have different ideas. We need to kill them—the ideas, not the people. The people we just need to torture."