More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33

"There is safety in numbers. And science. Clone your way to being safe. Nobody can protect you like you. And you and you and you."
"I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China!"
"When anybody honks at me in traffic, I blush, wave, and shout, “Thanks for being a fan.” Being a celebrity is a 24/7 thing."
"She asked if I wanted to spoon with her, and I told her I didn’t want to stir things up."
"I’m very close to my dad. He’s about six inches away right now and snoring in my ears."