Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of... - Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

"Scriptures, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based."

"Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage."

"Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly."

"Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel."

"Religion, n. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable."