"Reading makes you ready for the world. A man who doesn’t read is a man who is easily deceived. You must find that man and make him sign a contract, and you must do it before Satan does. Trust me, the profits are HUGE!"
"On Knowledge: You know that I know you know, but I want you to know that I know you know I know you know I know. It’s important for you to know that, you know?"
"I don’t want my love with her to wither like grapes on a vine, so I’ll water it with romance to turn it into wine."
"Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving a gift which you did not have to pay for."
"My cat is ignorant of the law. But then so am I. That means I am not his master, because we are both slaves."
"We had a whirlwind romance. That’s what happens when you date a tornado. Hold on, I have to stop tweeting for a bit because Kansas keeps calling."