"She looked so sexy with her sixteen cats that I just had to swipe right, but when she messaged me first quoting Monty Python, I knew it was Tinder love. Maybe on the first date we’ll knit the blanket we’ll make love under."
"I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me."
"I'm the kind of guy who puts other people first. Particularly if there’s danger up ahead. Now I’m not saying I’m any more cowardly than the next man, unless that next man is any other man besides my clone."
"I’ll wear a maze on a necklace, dangling over my chest, because if you want to get at my heart, you have to be ready to lose yourself."
"The difference between you and everyone else, is everyone else. And that’s a lot, so you should feel special."
"What reading level is the word love? It’s a four-letter word everybody knows the meaning of, but nobody can define it."