"Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot."
"Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else's feelings."
"Take a nap in a fireplace and you'll sleep like a log."
"Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it."
"I would love for the world to be happier."
"You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled."