"The goodbad news is she only stole half. The badgood news is she stole half. And when it’s love that’s been stolen, a hole the size of half your heart feels like the whole thing has been taken."
"A #startup is as fragile as a flower, and it needs a garden and a gardener to help it grow. Those gardens are called Business Incubators."
"Microwavable ice cream is the future. Don’t wait for love to melt all over your crotch. Scoop some Ice Cream Soup today."
"Different people have different ideas. We need to kill them—the ideas, not the people. The people we just need to torture."
"Telephone pole wires get in the way of great photos. Communication always gets in the way of communication."
"My I love yous were watered down, which was how I was able to grow such a beautiful garden. I’m a relationship farmer, and I’m growing as a person."