More quotes by Jarod Kintz, Xazaqazax

"If my favorite three letters are X, Z, and Q, then my favorite word is Xazaqazax. It means “a lover of love."
"As a fan of Agatha Christie, I think a brilliant mystery novel would be trying to identify the meat contents in a McDonald’s hamburger."
"They should make cell phones that are dishwasher safe. My cup runneth over—especially since both our drinks are in one glass because I’m too lazy to load the shotgun."
"I always thought it was Mo Be Dick. I know Mo, and he is a dick."
"I bought a faucet, but water wasn’t included. That’s like when you buy my love—it’s dirty and used, but soap isn’t included."