More quotes by George Carlin

"Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it."
"The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity."
"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."
"I don't know how you feel, but I'm pretty sick of church people. You know what they ought to do with churches? Tax them. If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. The Catholic Church alone could wipe out the national debt if all you did was tax their real estate."
"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."