More quotes by Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

"Escalators are the offspring of elevators and stairs. Love is the progeny of passion and admiration."
— Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81. Read More
"It doesn’t take a hurricane to blow out a birthday candle. Let this be a lesson in love—and cake etiquette."
— Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81. Read More
"Pain produces progress. So if you truly love me, you will try to hurt me as much as you can. If you really want me to grow as a person, you will water me with betrayal, abuse, neglect, derision, thievery, and possibly even torture."
— Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81. Read More
"My boxers should require batteries, because I’m such an exceptional lover that pizza delivery people call me for carry out. 30 minutes or less—as if!"
— Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81. Read More
"I water fake plants, because I’m growing a garden of fake mustaches. Lest no man (or woman) question my ability as a lover."
— Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81. Read More