"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."
"Humor is reason gone mad."
"If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere."
"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others."
"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies."
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."