Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you. - Groucho Marx

"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."

"Before I speak, I have something important to say."

"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."

"Humor is reason gone mad."

"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."