#masters

"Amazon.com Amazon.com is the Church of Consumer Capitalismwhose ethics demands we know the price of everything,the value of absolutely nothing of true moral valueand most importantly ~Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought."

"You're Totally Fucked' Defined [10w] What's before you is hopeless and behind you is negligible."

"Time Time waits for no man ~but for hot women Time makes exceptions."

"Friendship vs. Love [10w] Friendship requires poise and patience;love demands pluck and perseverance."

"Depression vs. Death Depression is anger turned within causing misery and hopelessness.Death is hate turned within until it totally eats you alive."

"Retail [10w] The first and last sale of the day are best."

"Rhyme vs. Reason {Couplet} Do not try to make rhyme of reason,nor reason of rhyme;For the former's too systematic,the latter's too sublime."

"Pacifism There's nothing like seeing action in war to turn a soldier into an instant pacifist or an instant killer."

"Natural Born Killers [10w] After their first,every soldier becomes a natural born killer."

"Wine [10w] American wines tasting as good as French wines are presumptuous."

"What Might Have Been {Couplet} Dwell not upon what might have been,Within such idle spin, you can never win."

"Q & A The illness of our time is not that we lack for answers;man's tragedy is that we've forgotten the important questions."

"Political Strategists Avoids the Controversial [10w] Politicians win by pandering to the base of shared assumptions."

"Relationships Deconstrcted [10w] Qualities we at first perceive as endearingsoon becomes annoying."

"Leaping lemmings! Leaping lemmings!I so adore ya'Can't get enoughJust want more’o'ya'!When I've had my fill'o'ya',I long for anotherRefill'o'ya.So, let's cut my spiel And here's the deal:I'm just gonna' haveta' cloneya'!So, when we're doneJust having fun --I'm just gonna' haveta' boneya'Again."

"California Milk Processor Board: Got Milk?... ...cuz I got a fucking hangover."

"Nursing Homes [10w] Nursing homes are house haunted by the living and half-dead."

"The Bard's Haikus about Haiku Listen to Shakespeare,'Iambic pentameterand haiku don't mix.'A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise mannever writes haiku.If you tickle usdon't we laugh? If you wrong usshall we not haiku?The good men dolives after them; the evil'sinterred with haikus.Some are born great, some achieve greatness, some scribblesome shitty haikus."

"Bonjour [10w] You're more obscure than first we met,"uttered with regret."

"Free Will [20w] A bunch of amino acids bumping up together is not the scientific explanation of free will, it's grilling a hamburger."