#personal-growth

"Comments Being the first to comment on a poem,is like breaking a bottle of champagneagainst the hull of a new ship."

"Seduction [10w] Seduction comes from our innate instincts for hunting and killing."

"Ringtones Haiku 'Oy! Dai, da-ye-nu,Dai, da-ye-nu, Dai, da-ye-nu...'"Answer your fucking phone!"

"Adult Pretend [10w] "I'm tired of playing 'pretend';let's play 'get-real, bitch."

"I'm Not Talking About Fruitcake [10w] The greatest gifts are the ones that can be regifted."

"Money vs. Happiness [10w] Why do people with money say,'money can't buy happiness'?"

"Too Beautiful for Words [10w] + [10w] When nature presents us with miracles too beautiful for words,it is either a mountain, a beach, or a baby."

"Imaginary Friends When my childhood imaginary friend got mad at mehe insulted me by calling me 'real'."

"Recipe for Love [10w] Recipe for love:compatibilityattraction ~just add penis and stir."

"The 2-Step Self-Discovery Program The first step in self-discovery is not giving a shit what anybody else thinks.The second step is knowing you're a self-centered asshole."

"Trance & Instinct The best poems come from trance and instinct;transcribing the unedited voice of universal consciousness."

"Office Depot: Taking Care of Business... ...with short breaks, bad management and no job advancement opportunities."

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."

"Rebellious Fish [10w] Sometimes swimming against the current turns you into glazed salmon."

"Today's Affirmation [10w] "I'll unplug myself from myselfand plug into something higher."

"Love vs. Control [10w] A lover you can control is not worthy of having."

"Scientific Discovery [10w] The greatest scientific discoveries were madelooking at the overlooked."

"Patience [10w] Patience is the most technologically advanced form of energy efficiency."

"Keep Austin Weird Haiku Neck dragon tattoo, piercings, purple haired kindergarten teacher.Keep Austin weird."

"Wherefore Art Thou, William [10w] Every Shakespeare mouse 'tis tim'rous and every lover 'tis fuck'd."