#unconditional-acceptance

"Perspective [10w] In every needle there's a haystack,if you step back."

"Ringtones Haiku 'Oy! Dai, da-ye-nu,Dai, da-ye-nu, Dai, da-ye-nu...'"Answer your fucking phone!"

"Fame [10w] Fame has a funny way of rewriting your entire past."

"Fat Bungee Jumpers When I watch a fat woman bungee jumpI swear I can feel the earth leaving its orbit."

"Epic vs. Great Poetry [10w] Epic poetry's about the extraordinary;Great poetry is about the commonplace."

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."

"Herpes [10w] Only greatness and genital herpes are conspicuous by their absence."

"ᏰέƦẙḽԃṏሁ Լέῳ [10w] II ᏰέƦẙḽԃṏሁ Լέῳ accounts for 15.7% of all Hello Poetry's pageviews."

"Enough [10w] Enough's the only thing most people can't get enough of."

"Miss Universe Contest Protest Haiku Fundamentalists protest Miss Universe contest.Go home, beat their wives."

"Love vs. Honeymoon [10w] Love is what truly begins when the honeymoon is over."

"Using the Backdoor If we compare writing computer code to sex,then hacking would be anal sex."

"Russian, Umerzhurnalistka Someone who too many questions for his own good. Literally, 'Dead journalist'."

"Natural Born Poets vs. Made Poets A natural born poet sees the future of poetry.A made poet clumsily imitates his vision."

"How they Measure Self-Worth in Fort Worth: Actual Texas Hooker Quote (the irony is priceless!) "Quit fucking acting like y'alls have me all figured outand don't you ever, EVER, lump me into the category of your trashy hooker girlfriend who charges $100/hr. for full service. Shit, I charge $200 minimum now ~because after the year of being at the bottom I know my self worth."

"Enmity Enmity is the soul of shit."

"I [10w] 'I' is a wellspring in the desertoverflowing with life."

"Committees [10w] A committee sits in a rectangle and talks in circles."

"Closets Opening and Closing [10w] + [10w] You can take sweet gay men out of the closet;you can't take the closet out of the master-bedroom suite."

"Till Death Do You Part [10w] Marriage will indeed change people ~for better or for worse."