#unconditional-acceptance

"Bagels and Lox Life's an everything bagel;love is a schmear of scallion cream cheese;and lox, no matter how you cut it,is resistant to dumbass metaphors."

"Man vs. Chimp Even chimpanzees are toolmakers,but only man has the unique honor of being a Godmaker."

"Don’t Let the Dead Fish Fool You [10w] Even the eyes of a dead fish can reflect light."

"Avery If a boy named Avery marries a girl named Avery,will they name or just label their children?"

"Gifts Never look a gift horse in the assor a donkey in the mouth."

"The Refugee I packed my car with cash and valuablesand headed for the border.At the first checkpoint they took my cash.At the second they took my valuables.At the border they took my car and my shoes.I walked barefoot the last 100 feet to freedom,and was greeted with open arms by a person I didn't recognize.In time I discovered that strangerwas the me they could not take from me."

"Detonation vs. Pre-Ignition [10w] Poets have thin skins;physicists call this differential burn rates."

"Obscure Poetry Obscurity does not make a poem better or deeper.It simply makes it obscure."

"Cinco de Mayo [10w] What day do the dead party to celebrate the living?"

"What's Hot [10w] + {Couplet} We incorrectly assume what's hotis becoming what we're not."

"Alone [10w] Alone in bed because of three wordsI hadn't said."

"Tickled Pink Today,without thinking,I filled my half-empty fish tank, to its brink.Having doubled the size of his universe,my Siamese bettais quite tickled pinkThe same thing happens when you fill my half-empty world with your love.Bai, keep pourin'!"

"Coffee Wisdom New Yawk [6] You either pay me the five large nowor yoos can choosebetween the toilet plungeror the hot coffee enemaya fuckin jamook."

"God vs. Satan [10w] Why can't God and Satan get along?They're both detail-oriented."

"Party Hat [10w] Circus clowns, Frenchmen, and sanitation workers look better in party-hats.."

"Writer's Prayers That Don't Work "Lord, lead me from the banality of everyday life,to the gleaming one beneath the surface."

"Minimum Wage [10w] Even trained bears couldn't bear working for bare minimum wage."

"Storm [10w] Clouds darken to X-rays revealingthe tumorous thunder resounding within."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."

"Death & Poetry Nothing softens the blow of death like a cushy poem to fall upon."