More quotes by George Carlin

"I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood."
"I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood."
"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."
"I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no "I"in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an "I"in independence, individuality and integrity."
"I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up."