"I have a real problem keeping friends. I'm always running out of space in my freezer."
"I love tables. And dancing. Oh, and I love table dancing, although Grandmother always says, "Wait until we're finished eating."
"My parents always said that knowledge was the best gift they could give me, probably because they were too cheap to buy me Christmas or Birthday presents."
"If writers write, then rangers range. And I’d like to wake up every morning and be a mother, so I could eat my own clothes."
"There Are Two Typos Of People In This World: Those Who Can Edit And Those Who Can’t"
"It’s been said that the most successful people are often early risers. So that’s why I started getting up in the afternoon, which is well before any “successful” person even thinks of going to bed."