More quotes by Steven Wright

"I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography."
"Sorry... my mind was wandering... one time it went all the way to Venus and ordered a meal I couldn’t pay for."
"If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?"
"In a lot of ways, success is much harder than I thought it would be. I figured that you'd get here and then everything would be happily ever after. But, it's hard work, almost harder once you're successful because you've got to maintain it."
"There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."