More quotes by George Carlin

"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."
"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house."
"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."
"It's important in life if you don't give a shit. It can help you a lot."
"I don't know how you feel, but I'm pretty sick of church people. You know what they ought to do with churches? Tax them. If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. The Catholic Church alone could wipe out the national debt if all you did was tax their real estate."