More quotes by Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to write a poem about "Truth,""Honor,""Dignity,"and whether the toilet paper should roll over or under when you pull on it."
"I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair."
"I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral."
"I want to end global hunger by feeding half the world’s starving people to the other half."
"I want to write a book so long that it will take the average person their whole life to read. It will be exactly the same length as the Bible."