I want to end global hunger by feeding half the world’s star... - Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to write a book called, "Bonfires and Bras,"which follows around a young, braless feminist who struggles to adopt in air conditioned rooms, as her hardened nipples cause her excess embarrassment."

"I like to spoon after I fork."

"I want to see an elephant hunt down a man for the sole purpose of collecting his teeth, while a chorus of typewriters sings songs that praises the bananas for their wisdom, leadership, and their high levels of potassium."

"I want to be strapped to a table, while a family of chickens argues over who gets to eat my legs."

"I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral."