"I wanted to tell her “I love you” back, but I guess in waiting for the perfect moment (the next commercial break), I ended up completely forgetting."
"Love is like whoa! Actually, it's closer to woe."
"She has a sly smile, and eyes that seem to see my essence as they explore my soul and implore my spirit to enter her. I look at her and I see love."
"My boxers should require batteries, because I’m such an exceptional lover that pizza delivery people call me for carry out. 30 minutes or less—as if!"
"Escalators are the offspring of elevators and stairs. Love is the progeny of passion and admiration."
"You and I have a love so secret that not even you know about it. But first, let me introduce myself."