"The waves were choppy, like Chuck Norris' karate hands. The ocean would have been still, if I weren't making love in it."
"If my last name were Hunter, I’d probably be a fisherman. That’s just the kind of lover I am."
"To become one who believes two become one, you need love in your life."
"I’m running from the very person I’m chasing, and this is how I know I’m in love."
"My boxers should require batteries, because I’m such an exceptional lover that pizza delivery people call me for carry out. 30 minutes or less—as if!"
"I’d rather have 100% of 5 than 50% of 10—especially with love."